Dealing with Nigerian Scamer in fun

So some how one of my email address was fortunate enough to reach very elite and rich community of Great oil rich country of Nigeria. In America a small bank teller will not even give me a chance to see a manager of my bank, stating there is nothing that she can not help me with respect to my free checking account with $45 balance that I need to go see bank manager. But in Nigeria I am in direct contact with "Rev Dr Valentine Samuel,"Consultant Director,Central Bank of Nigeria. regardless of my current financial situation of having only $45.00 in my bank account. I know my destiny has changed. I no longer have to play $1 in Mega Million Lottery to win hundres of million dollars in free fall. Following is a actual correspondance between me and Dr. Samuel as it went along. 

My $17 million credit card from Nigeria 

YOUR CARD IS READY text 

From

mr_ibrahim_lamorde mr_ibrahim_lamorde@yahoo.comhide details

To

Recipients mr_ibrahim_lamorde@yahoo.com Dear customer, There is an issue with ATM card payment department office here.  We have programmed your total amount of $17,500,000.000 into an ATM Gold Master Card to  deliver to you. Here is your card number. (5199 1101 1456 8299) and your pin code will  send to you as soon as you reply with your information's activation will be made by  yourself to enable you change your pin number immediately you received your pin.   I am fully committed to deliver your FUND to you in your country order  to differentiate myself from the many Nigeria you have dealt with i will never in   life disappointed you an i will like you to try and see me as a man of God.   The ATM card payment center has been mandated to issue out $17,500,000.000   (SEVENTEEN MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS) as part payment for the New Year 2013.  delivering of your ATM Gold Card with courier options bellow.   DHL 48HOURS DELIVERY. SHIPPING FEE $65 REGISTRATION FEE $90 TOTAL $155  SPEEDWAYS 48HOURS DELIVERY SHIPPING FEE $43 REGISTRATION FEE $90 TOTAL FEE $133 UPS  48HOURS DELIVERY. SHIPPING FEE $63 REGISTRATION FEE $90 TOTAL FEE $153 FEDEX 48HOURS  DELIVERY. REGISTRATION FEE $90 SHIPPING FEE $75 TOTAL FEE $165 You have to choose  one courier of your choice as given above and make the payment to enable us register  your card for delivery. OUR PAYMENT INFORMATION IS BELLOW. NAME: =====CHIDI EZE 2.  COUNTRY: =====NIGERIA 3. CITY: =====LAGOS 4. TEST QUESTION: =====GOOD 5. TEST ANSWER:  =====YES 6. AMOUNT: ===== You are advised to include the following details below: 1.  Your Full Name................. 2. Direct Telephone Numbers............... 3.  Contact Address.......................   Finally, you are 100% assured that you will not pay any other fee and your package  will deliver to you, please stop any contact you have with anybody about your payment  because your payment should not cost you anything accept this little fee for the deliver ing and registration of your card REPLY US HERE revdrvalentinsamuel3@yahoo.es Best Regard s, Rev Dr Valentine Samuel, Consultant Director,Central Bank of Nigeria  I was so happy with this news so I replied to Dr Samuel at the address above  Re: YOUR CARD IS READY text  JXXX MXXXXX to dr.terry2017 + 1 moreshow details Dear Dr Samuel     Thank you very much for your reply. If I send you half the money now can you give me expiration date and last three digits of the card via email ? and one more thing does the name on the card says my full name Jack Meculo ? Can I use this card before Christmas? what is a maximum spending limit a day? Is this a credit card or debit card? If it is a credit card how much is my monthly interest and where can I send monthly payment ?      Please hurry and reply as I really need money now and in a process of getting loan at high interest rate. Do you have my address for mailing ? Thank You  Jack   Today I got the email back Rev Dr Samuel this morning. was impressed that he sent me picture of his official ID (With two different signatures) , as well actual picture of offecial    Rev Dr Valentine Samuel, Consultant Director Central Bank of Nigeria ATM PAYMENT DEPARTMENT (CBN) CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA . Dear Jack Meculo Infect i am very happy as i read your message, The only thing you need to do is to pay your Stamp Duty it will only cost you $350 that is why you have not gotten your fund because MR. PRESIDENT will sign on it and a copy of the STAMP DUTY Will forward to you as well, we need your cooperation and honest to us so that all the STAMP DUTY will get sign by our PRESIDENT and copy of it will send to you, the name in the card is Jack Meculo if you can send the fee this week your card will as well deliver you the same week and you will start to withdraw money out of the card, the maximum spending limit a day is $30,000, this is a Visa card you should as well send us your house address. I am giving you a 100% assurance and guarantee from the depth of my heart that this sum of money that we requested from you will be the Last and Final payment that you are going to pay and after that this Transaction will then be finally completed and your much awaited ATM Card will then safely get to your Address.   Therefore, I need your utmost support and understanding to actualize this dream.   My identity and personality is verifiable, and I promise to deliver the card to you in your country without any hitch. Please do not allow this mission to die off because of this fee . I meant so well for you and I believe you will appreciate me more when you have finally received your partial payment of $17.5 million dollars upon the arrival with the package in your country. without questioning from the financial monitoring authorities. Do take my professional advise and follow my official directive to achieve success on the release and payment. 1) STAMP DUTY $350 2)FEDEX 48HOURS DELIVERY.SHIPPING FEE $75 3)REGISTRATION FEE $425 TOTAL FEE IS: $425 SEND THE FEE VIA WESTERN UNION AND USE THIS INFORMATION HERE FOR THE WESTERN UNION. RECEIVER'S NAME: DIEGWU UCHENNA DESTINATION : LAGOS NIGERIA AMOUNT EXPECTED:$425 TEST QUESTION: NICE ANSWER: OK MTCN,,,,,,,,,,,,,,?? SENDER NAME,,,,,,,,,?? SENDER ADDRESS,,,,,,,,,,,?? You can as well contact our president via his email goodluckjonathan.1011@presidency.com and ask him more about me.